Things I Don’t Want to Know

Have you ever found out things you wish you didn’t have to know?

Over the last weekend, I had the pleasure of picking up a little nugget of knowledge that I really wish I didn’t need to know. It’s something that’s pretty important, but I just don’t want to have to use this information. I don’t like it cluttering up my brain’s inbox, making it more difficult for me to find fun, useless information like the name of Jason Schwartzman’s band, or how farting cows are actually worse for the environment than driving SUVs.

POOT

Anyway, since I’ve got this information in my noggin, I feel it only fair to share it with the world. And by world, I mean the 75-100 or so people that actually read this drivel.

Ahem.

My new knowledge:

I now know the difference between a TORNADO WATCH and a TORNADO WARNING.

Allow me to explain.

A tornado watch is when the weather patterns indicate that there MIGHT be a tornado forming in your area. You should be aware, but there haven’t actually been any seen in your area.

A tornado warning is when a satellite or someone has ACTUALLY seen a tornado in your area. Batten down the fucking hatches and get the kids into the trailer. God is sending down her wrath in the form of a spinning, deadly air mass and you just might be in the way.

I heart tornadoes!


So there. Now you know, too. I hope that little chunk of information has also taken up some of your brain space and made you forget which months have 30 days in them, and which have 31.

YOU’RE WELCOME.

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~ by Andrea on July 27, 2010.

6 Responses to “Things I Don’t Want to Know”

  1. You are a pillar of useful information

  2. See I learned that in high school and I was always kind of proud of myself for having that knowledge. Like I was one step away from being a meteorologist.

  3. I learned that when I was a kid – watch means the conditions are right and there could be one, but it hasn’t touched down yet, warning means there’s been one sited so be ready to take cover.

    Living the midwest, we’re used to having watches all the time during tornado season, I don’t even think about it anymore =)

  4. haha, good stuff

    -Mike, somebodyhadtosayit.com

  5. As a geographer, I did know that actually.

    Does that make it better? Or just sad? Hmm…

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